17 Sarcastic Quotes

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The best Sarcastic quotes, remarks, sayings and comments on life and relationships.

1. Would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now?

Sarcastic Quotes - Would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now?
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Tags: Psychology   |   



2. People, generally, suck.

- Christopher Moore

Sarcastic Quotes - People, generally, suck.
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Tags: Funny   |    Life   |    Minion   |   



3. Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind.

- Terry Pratchett

Sarcastic Quotes - Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind.
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4. Don't look at me in that tone of voice.

- Dorothy Parker

Sarcastic Quotes - Don't look at me in that tone of voice.
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Tags: Sassy   |    Your Opinion   |    Judgemental   |   



5. Every year, back comes Spring, with nasty little birds yapping their fool heads off and the ground all mucked up with plants.

- Dorothy Parker

Sarcastic Quotes - Every year, back comes Spring, with nasty little birds yapping their fool heads off and the ground all muc
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Tags: Pessimism   |    Negativity   |    Funny   |    Sassy   |    Sarcastic   |    Inspirational Women   |    Instagram captions for Girls   |   



6. One day Michael came in and complained about a speed bump on the highway. I wonder who he ran over then.

- Jim Halpert

Sarcastic Quotes - One day Michael came in and complained about a speed bump on the highway. I wonder who he ran over then.
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Tags: TV Show Quotes   |    Sarcastic   |    The Office   |    Speed Bump   |    Highway   |   



7. Sorry I annoyed you with my friendship.

- Andy Bernard

Sarcastic Quotes - Sorry I annoyed you with my friendship.
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Tags: TV Show Quotes   |    Sarcastic   |    Fake Friendship   |    The Office   |    Ungrateful   |    Thankless   |   



8. Whenever I'm about to do something, I think,

'Would an idiot do that?' and if they would,

I do not do that thing.

- Dwight Schrute

Sarcastic Quotes - Whenever I'm about to do something, I think, 'Would an idiot do that?' and if they would, I do not
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Tags: TV Show Quotes   |    Idiot   |    Sarcastic   |    Thinking   |    Savage Comebacks   |    The Office   |    Do Something   |   



9. I’m not a millionaire.

I thought I would be by the time I was 30, but I wasn’t even close.

Then I thought maybe by 40, but by 40 I had less money than I did when I was 30.

- Michael Scott

Sarcastic Quotes - I’m not a millionaire. I thought I would be by the time I was 30, but I wasn’t even close. Then
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Tags: TV Show Quotes   |    Money   |    Sarcastic   |    The Office   |    Millionaire   |    Time   |    Turning 30   |    Turning 40   |    Less Money   |   



10. Why are you the way that you are?

- Michael Scott

Sarcastic Quotes - Why are you the way that you are?
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Tags: Burn   |    TV Show Quotes   |    Sarcastic   |    The Office   |    Oh God Why   |   



11. Look, it doesn’t take a genius to know that every organization thrives when it has two leaders. Go ahead, name a country that doesn’t have two presidents. A boat that sets sail without two captains. Where would Catholicism be without the popes?

- Oscar Martinez

Sarcastic Quotes - Look, it doesn’t take a genius to know that every organization thrives when it has two leaders. Go ahead
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Tags: TV Show Quotes   |    Sarcastic   |    The Office   |    Genius   |   



12. Last year, Creed asked me how to set up a blog. Wanting to protect the world from being exposed to Creed’s brain, I opened up a Word document on his computer and put an address at the top.

I’ve read some of it.

Even for the Internet, it’s… pretty shocking.

- Ryan Howard

Sarcastic Quotes - Last year, Creed asked me how to set up a blog. Wanting to protect the world from being exposed to Creed
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Tags: TV Show Quotes   |    Sarcastic   |    Blogging   |    Fool   |    The Office   |    Internet   |    Shocking   |   



13. I had a great summer. I got west nile virus, lost a ton of weight. Then I went back to the lake. And I stepped on a piece of glass in the parking lot, which hurt. That got infected. Even though I peed on it...

- Michael Scott

Sarcastic Quotes - I had a great summer. I got west nile virus, lost a ton of weight. Then I went back to the lake. And I ste
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Tags: TV Show Quotes   |    Sarcastic   |    Things Getting Worse   |    Dumbness   |    The Office   |    Summer   |    Unaware   |   



14. Kelly: If I was you, I would just like, freak out and get really drunk, and then tell someone I was pregnant.

Pam: Okay, that's a lot of good ideas. Thanks.

- Pam Beesly

Sarcastic Quotes - Kelly: If I was you, I would just like, freak out and get really drunk, and then tell someone I was pregna
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Tags: TV Show Quotes   |    Drama   |    Sarcastic   |    Good Ideas   |    The Office   |    Thanks   |   



15. InshaAllah (noun):


A Magical land where 99% of all promises, presence and punctuality is stored.

Sarcastic Quotes - InshaAllah (noun): A Magical land where 99% of all promises, presence and punctuality is stored.
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Tags: Sarcastic   |    Promise   |    Funny Muslim Memes and Quotes   |    Inshallah   |    Punctuality   |    Magical Land   |   



16. I'm sarcastic because punching people is so Haraam.

Sarcastic Quotes - I'm sarcastic because punching people is so Haraam.
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Tags: Sarcastic   |    Haram   |    Annoying People   |    Funny Muslim Memes and Quotes   |   



17. Some women have mood swings... others have mood theme parks.

Sarcastic Quotes - Some women have mood swings... others have mood theme parks.
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Tags: Mood Swings   |    Sarcastic   |   







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