When your non-muslim friends think your prayer mat is the magi ...
Funny Muslim Memes and Quotes Quotes
1. When your non-muslim friends think your prayer mat is the magic carpet Alladin used to show Jasmine the world.
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2. When Zawjati says you can't have a second wife:
"Don't tempt me to make you shaheed tonight. I am 4 wives in one."
3. #BarbieGirlMix #MuslimVersion
I'm a Hijabi girl, in the Western world
Life Islamic, it's fantastic!
You can't see my hair
Or touch me anywhere
Submission to Allah, not his creation
[Cmon hijabi lets go party]
No no no nooo
[Cmon hijabi lets go party]
NO Harami! You Harami!
4. *Results Day*
Mum: What did you get?
Me: Quotes Quran, Al-hadid, 57:20
"And what is the worldly life except the enjoyment of delusion."
Hey do you speak Islam?
Yeah I speak Islam. I'm from Muslimstan, and i follow the shawarma law.
6. That Hijab bun...
is tooo damn high!
7. Reading Aytal-kursi and blowing it on your exam paper before you begin cos you don't know what shaytanic questions you're about to see...
8. Worst thing instagram did was romanticize salah -
"I want someone who will wake me up for Fajr".
How about you marry an alarm clock you lazy cow
9. Me: *buys black scarf*
Family: "You already have a hundred other black scarfs"
Me: "but feel the material on this one, the texture is different"
Going in your backyard/frontyard with a blanket on your head since you're too lazy to put your hijab on
11. I don't always wear a Hijab
But when I do, it is with a Tight top and skinny jeans.
12. InshaAllah (noun):
A Magical land where 99% of all promises, presence and punctuality is stored.
13. Post-Iftar Pregnancy
14. My mosque posted a sign after Jummah Prayer, "To the brother who stole our AC, you can keep it. It's hot where you are going."
15. *Muslim Parties*
Yo let's tell jinn stories.
16. We're allowed to marry 4,
But I don't think that's necessary because you are a 10.
17. When your non-muslim friends think your prayer mat is the magic carpet Alladin used to show Jasmine the world.
18. People: You are allowed to drive?
Me: No, I took a magic carpet ride here.
19. People: Hijabi's are so lucky they don't have to wash their hair.
Me: Sis, we're Muslim, not cave women.
Is it Meat you are looking for?
21. Funny how people mock the Islamic dress codes, yet on graduation day they all wear clothes similar to jubbah to look modest and successful.
22. People: What's under your niqab?
Me: My face. What's under your makeup?
23. I'm sarcastic because punching people is so Haraam.
24. Peppa Pig:
Muslims are my favorite people, rest of ya'll juz eating my family.
25. I hold my wife's hand when we go out. She thinks I'm being romantic. But really it's to stop her running off to do shopping.
26. *When you have to swerve a marriage proposal*
"Istikhara says No"
27. About 1 billion animals killed each day by KFC, McDonalds, Burger King etc. and no one bats an eye.
During Eid Al Adha, Muslims sacrifice them to feed poor people and everyone loses their mind.
28. If you can handle my face at Fajr, I know it's true love.
29. I'll not eat fried things this Ramadan
Whole Muslim Ummah: HAHAHAHAHA
Even fried things: HAHAHAHAHA
30. She: How was my cooking?
Me: Mashallah your cooking is so bad even shaytan will remind me to say Bismillah so he doesn't have to eat it with me.