Pivoting is not the end of the disruption process, but the beg ...

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1. Pivoting is not the end of the disruption process, but the beginning of the next leg of your journey.

- Jay Samit


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2. Well you are worse than I thought.


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3. Did you hear that? It’s the sound of no one caring…


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4. Woman: "If you were my husband, I'd poison your coffee."

Man: "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."


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5. You have a face not even a mother could love.


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6. I can get a plastic surgery to fix my ugliness, you on the other hand will be stupid for eternity.


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7. You’re gay.
You wish i was.


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8. I am happier than you are.


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9. At least I smell good.


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10. Yeah, that's no problem, you're not my type anyway.


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11. I love what you’ve done with your hair. How do you get it to come out of the nostrils like that?


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12. Stupidity isn't a crime, so you’re free to go.


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13. If I had a face like yours I’d sue my parents.


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14. You’re not stupid; you just have bad luck when thinking.


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15. I was hoping for a battle of wits but you appear to be unarmed.


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16. You bring everyone a lot of joy, when you leave the room.


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17. I don’t exactly hate you, but if you were on fire and I had water, I’d drink it.


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18. Shock me, say something intelligent.


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19. You have the perfect face for radio.


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20. Damn not you again.


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21. I fart to make you smell better.


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22. 100,000 sperm, you were the fastest?


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23. Ordinarily people live and learn. You just live.


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24. If I am ugly then you must be hideous


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25. Guys like you are why girls turn into lesbians.


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26. Your only purpose in life is as an organ donor.


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27. Have a nice day, somewhere else.


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28. "Wanna hear a joke?"
"No, thanks I am already looking at one!"


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29. After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you."
She replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."


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30. If you really want to know about mistakes, you should ask your parents.


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31. Please, keep talking. I always yawn when I am interested.


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32. Jesus loves you… but everyone else thinks you’re an asshole.


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33. You have the right to remain silent because whatever you say will probably be stupid anyway.


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34. I had a nightmare. I dreamed I was you.


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35. Nice shirt, what brand is it? Clearance?


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36. You have enough fat to make another human.


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37. I am not anti-social. I just don’t like you.


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38. You shouldn't talk about your mom like that.


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39. The 80s called. They want their haircut back.
The 1880s called, too. They want their joke back.


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40. Is that your face? Or did your neck just throw up?

Couldn’t help it. One look at you and I started to vomit.


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41. I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and crap a better argument than yours.

Well it would be a nice change from all the crap that’s been coming out of your mouth!


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42. Is that perfume or marinade?
Actually, it’s jerk repellent, but it doesn’t seem to be working.


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43. Do they make those pants in men’s sizes?
Why, are you looking for something to get your wife?


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44. How’s the wife and my kids?
Your kids? That explains why they’re so ugly.


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45. You have your entire life to be a jerk. Why not take today off?


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46. Some day you’ll go far — and I really hope you stay there.


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47. Sometimes it’s better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you’re stupid than open it and remove all doubt.


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48. I’m not a proctologist, but I know an asshole when I see one.


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49. Everyone’s entitled to act stupid once in awhile, but you really abuse the privilege.


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50. Good story, but in what chapter do you shut the fuck up?


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51. Don’t hate me because I’m smart. Hate me because your girlfriend thinks so.


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52. Are you always such an idiot, or do you just show off when I’m around?


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53. You have a right to your opinion and I have a right to ignore it.


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54. I used to think I was overreacting. Now I realize that it was a normal reaction to an abnormal amount of bullshit.


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55. It's scary to think that people like you are graduating from college.


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56. That's why you shouldn't speak until you're spoken to.


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57. You better hope you marry rich.


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58. Aww, it's so cute when you try to talk about things you don't understand.


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59. If everywhere you go there’s a problem.. Guess what?


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60. No really, it’s adorable when you blame everyone but yourself.


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61. I think some people enjoy complaining almost as much as they enjoy doing nothing about it.


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62. You. Cut out that egocentric control bullshit now.


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63. I’m sorry that the control freak in you activates the psycho bitch in me.


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64. Oh yes, let’s ignore everything I just said and talk some more about you.


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65. I don’t know why you think you have a psychic ability to read me!


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66. It’s called originality, you should try it sometime.


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67. Thanks for trying so hard to be just like me. I wouldn’t want to be you, either.


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68. You were born an original don’t die a copy.


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