Never laugh at your wife's choices. You are one of them.

Funny Wife Quotes

1. Never laugh at your wife's choices. You are one of them.

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Funny Marriage   |    Choices   |    Judgemental   |   

Explore More Quotes

2. Me and my wife lives happily for 20 years. Then we met.

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Funny   |    Twisted   |   

3. My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

- Socrates

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Funny Marriage   |   

4. If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way.

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Funny Marriage   |   

5. My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.

- Henny Youngman

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Kill   |    Cooking   |    Funny   |   

6. Don't try to understand women.
Women understand women, that is why they hate each other.

    Embed Code  

Tags: Understanding Women   |    Funny   |    Funny Wife   |   

---

---

7. My wife says she's leaving me because of my addiction to antidepressants. So I thought about it and realized; that’s great, then I won’t need them anymore.

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Addiction   |    Funny Depression   |    Realization   |   

8. The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn’t talking to me.

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Funny   |    Funny Love   |   

9. Wife: “I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?”
Husband: “You have perfect eyesight.”

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |   

10. Never laugh at your wife's choices. You are one of them.

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Funny Marriage   |    Choices   |    Judgemental   |   

11. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes.
She hugged me.

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Hug   |    Sassy   |    Wife   |   

12. Wife: I have changed my mind.
Husband: Does the new one work?

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Savage Comebacks   |    Sarcastic   |    Conversation   |    Question   |    Sassy   |    Burn   |   

13. Astrologer: Do you want to know your husband's future?
Wife: Rubbish. I will decide his future. You tell me his past.

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Future   |    Past   |    Astrology   |   

14. Tell her she is beautiful, not HOT. She is your wife, not temperature.

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Hot   |    Beautiful   |   

15. When your wife says "GO AHEAD" it is a dare, not a permission. Don't do it!

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    How Dare You   |    Permissible   |   

16. If at first you don't succeed, try doing it the way your wife told you.

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Marriage   |    Success   |    Listening a Person   |   

17. My wife says I only have 2 faults. I don't listen and something else...

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Wife   |    Listening a Person   |   

18. A man should never plant a garden larger than his wife can take care of.

- T H Everette

    Embed Code  

Tags: Funny Gardening   |    Funny Wife   |