I asked the staff at my local garden centre what to grow in my ...

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1. I asked the staff at my local garden centre what to grow in my garden. They gave me some sage advice.


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2. What does the letter “A” have in common with a flower?
They both have bees coming after them.


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3. Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing.


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4. Why didn’t anyone laugh at the gardener’s jokes?
Because they were too corny.


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5. What do you get if you cross a four leaf clover with poison ivy?
A rash of good luck.


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6. What do you call it when worms take over the world?
Global Worming


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7. What kind of tree has hands?
A palm tree.


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8. What happened to the plant in math class?
It grew square roots.


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9. Thyme is of the essence.


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10. Turnip down for what?


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11. Lettuce be thankful


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12. I don’t carrot at all!!!


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13. Just dill with it


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14. Time to celery-brate


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15. I hope thistle cheer you up!


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16. Don’t kale my vibe


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17. I love you from my head tomatoes


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18. Good chives only


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19. I’m rooting for you!


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20. Wood you be mine?


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21. My heart beets for you


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22. I yam what I yam


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23. Absolutely Radishing.


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24. You had me at aloe.


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25.

Garden Love Puns



Aloe You Vera Much


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26. Be nice or leaf.


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27. Wish I could turn back thyme...


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28. Make thyme for loved ones...


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29. It’s Party thyme!


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30. Find Inner Peas.


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31. Good Thymes!


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32. Oh Kale Yeah!


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33. LETTUCE ROMAINE Friends.


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34. No FIG Deal!


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35. Don't let things BUG you.


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36. Look forward to the FUCHSIA


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37. I Love You BERRY Much.


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38. Orange you so sweet?


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39. Collateral Cabbage.


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40. THYME to TURNIP the BEET.


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41. BEES PLEASE!


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42. I Wet my Plants.


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43. That’s a bit mulch!


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44. Just one of ROSE things...


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45. I beg your garden?


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46. I wasn’t all that interested in gardening, but I planted a few seeds, and it grew on me.


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47. I want to start gardening, but I haven’t botany plants.


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48. I was offered a job as a gardener, but I didn’t take it because the celery was too low.


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49. I asked the staff at my local garden centre what to grow in my garden. They gave me some sage advice.


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50. I'm so Grapeful for you.


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51. Rootin' for ya.


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52. Don't be Ranunculus.


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53. I hope thistle cheer you up.


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54. Please be SEEDED.


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55. Aloe Ha!


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56. Congratulations on your big a-chive-ment.


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57. Say Aloe to my little friend.


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58. We were mint to be...


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59. When kissing flowers, tulips are better than one.


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60. Ain’t nobody got thyme for that.


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61. How did the baby banana become so spoiled?
Mama banana left him out in the sun for too long.


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62. Lettuce celebrate with cake.


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63. What did the farmer say when someone complimented him on his corn harvest?

Aww, shucks!


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64. My sister is a real big dill.


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65. Why can't tomatoes ever beat lettuce in a race?

Because lettuce is always a head, and tomatoes have to ketchup!


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66. I know someone who was habitually late, until his doctor reccomended sleeping in a herb garden. Sounds odd, I know, but now he wakes up on Thyme.


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