A plane lands and shortly after the flight attendant comes ove ...

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Airplane Puns Quotes

1. A plane lands and shortly after the flight attendant comes over the speaker.
“Hi, folks! Sorry about that rough landing. It wasn’t the captain’s fault. It definitely wasn’t my fault…
It was the asphalt.”


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2. Where does a mountain climber keep his plane?

In a cliff-hangar.


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3. Will invisible airplanes ever be a thing?

I just can’t see them taking off.


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4. A businessman was having a tough time lugging his lumpy, oversized travel bag onto the plane. Helped by a flight attendant, he finally managed to stuff it in the overhead bin.
“Do you always carry such heavy luggage?” she sighed.
“No more,” the man said. “Next time, I’m riding in the bag, and my partner can buy the ticket!”


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5. A plane lands and shortly after the flight attendant comes over the speaker.
“Hi, folks! Sorry about that rough landing. It wasn’t the captain’s fault. It definitely wasn’t my fault…
It was the asphalt.”


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Tags: Airplane Puns   |   

6. Why did the airplane get sent to his room?

Bad altitude.


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7. I asked a flight attendant to change my seat because of a crying baby next to me.

It turns out you can’t do that if the baby is yours.


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8. I decided to leave work an hour early today.

The flight attendants started freaking out when I grabbed my parachute, though.


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9. A plane is full of a bunch of Redditors, and suddenly a man starts having a heart attack. One of the flight attendants (who frequents r/AskReddit) notices this and quickly shouts: “People of the plane, we’re having an emergency! Is anyone on this plane a doctor?”
Immediately, five people stand up and all say, “I’m not a doctor, but….”


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10. What do you call it when a giraffe swallows a toy jet?

A “plane in the neck.”


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